Is your marriage good? Or is it just ok? Would you like it to be better?
Wife for Life: The Power to Succeed in Marriage by Ramona Zabriskie is full of actionable, do-able ideas and strategies to make your marriage the “happily ever after” you have ever dreamed of.
Yes, this is a book for women, about what women can do to improve their marriages. Before you get your panties in a bunch about how marriage is a two-way street (duh!), be aware that Ms. Zabriskie is working on a companion book for husbands. But it’s also important to remember that if we want to improve our marriages, it’s not about what our husbands ought to do or need to do, but what we ought to do, need to do and can do.
The book is written in a conversational style, feeling much like the reader has spent the afternoon in a sit-down with Ms. Zabriskie. Personal experiences from her own life and experiences are sprinkled throughout the book, giving it an additional layer of authenticity. So often self-help books are filled with “case studies” and “patient experiences” that feel slightly anonymous and maybe even a little unreal—I’m not saying they aren’t real, but it’s harder to connect with anonymous people than with someone who has a face and a name—especially with such a personal subject. But I didn’t have that feeling reading this book.
But it’s not just a collection of anecdotes. The author has made a thorough study of marriage literature and backs up her examples with research and reference.
Part One is titled “Why You Both Want a Grand, Lifelong Marriage” and Chapters 3 and 4 talk about finding your why and finding your husband’s why. Finding the why has always been a motivator for me. I like to know what makes people tick. I feel like it gives us an additional layer of understanding and empathy.
The other sections cover how to avoid being a dream breaker and what to do to make his dreams come true. One recurring theme is that we need to learn to love and appreciate our spouses (I am sure there will be complementary chapters in her next book) and stop with the finding fault. I am always uncomfortable when I am out with a group of women and the subject drifts to husband bashing. Not that my husband is perfect (shhhh! Don’t tell him I told you), but I have long since learned that cutting him down does nothing for our relationship. Whenever I am tempted to bash, I try and remember all the reasons I was attracted to him in the first place and all the reasons I married him.
There were some good reminders in this book for me, as well as some eye-openers. I think we have a pretty awesome marriage here, but that doesn’t mean it couldn’t be better. I will definitely be trying some of Ms. Zabriskie’s methods and principles and see how they improve my most important relationship.
Wife for Life: The Power to Succeed in Marriage is available from Amazon.com in paperback, Kindle and audio editions.
You can learn more about Ramona Zabriskie and her Wife for Life programs at her website ramonazabriskie.com